Surviving Spouse Corner -April 2019
Sometimes we who have gone abroad with our husbands, think that we have had difficulties and hardships living in a foreign country simply because ,perhaps, of the lack of commodities, frills or luxuries, that we enjoy in this nation for our comfort.
When we were in Germany, I felt that it had been a time of affliction because of the dire circumstances I was living in, with my husband, two babies in diapers and bottles, Cindy and Casey, a seven year old, Priscilla, no washing machine and in a very small apartment that had no hot water.
The weather, to me, was extremely depressing, since I was from Texas. I was fortunate that I had my wonderful seven-year old daughter who was a joy, a blessing and was a very helpful precious girl.
I felt that God had helped me through that experience, because it had been a very difficult time of my life. But looking back and seeing now what some women are going through with demanding, trying and extreme trials, makes me think that what I went through, was not all that hard.
In my church, there is a lady that I admire. Her name is Catherine Lang. She has 5 Children: Sam 13, Nephi 11, Jacob 8, Joseph 4 and Moroni 3. All of them with ADHD and three are Autistic. Her husband, a God loving man, Cpt Benjamin D. Lang, a wonderful husband and a great Dad to his children, is deployed to South Korea.
Mrs. Lang's love and trust in the Lord is incredible. To say the least, this loving mother is an inspiration to us in church. She displays such an amazing strength of faith that radiates to all that surround her. The love and care that she dedicates to her children is evident by the children's appearance.
From her, we have learned that nothing is impossible to God and that no matter what situations we find ourselves in, we can survive and endure our challenges through this life to the end with His help.
You’ve probably been both a mentor and a role model, but do you know the difference between the two?
Children look to parents, teachers, coaches, or even older siblings or relatives as role models for inspiration on how to behave. Even adults seek to model themselves after those who appear to be successful or who they consider are worth emulating, such as famous leaders in history, professional athletes, and entertainers. It is important to remember, however, that role models can be positive or negative, and it is up to the individual to choose whose actions to follow.
Role models and mentors, though similar, are, in fact, quite different. Role models often are distant, having no actual connection or contact with those who admire them. A mentor, as described in Webster’s Dictionary, is “a trusted counselor or guide,” and because of a close relationship with his or her students, have a more profound impact. A mentor is someone who looks for ways to help others reach their full potential.
Whether we realize it or not, each of us has been a mentor and a role model at some time in our lives. Good mentors provide a positive influence on those around them by being willing to share the knowledge, skills, and expertise they have gained and developed. Effective mentoring takes work and enthusiasm; it requires the mentor to take a personal interest in his mentee, providing guidance and constructive feedback in an effort to grow that person to his or her fullest.
John Crosby aptly describes a mentor as a “brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction.” As a leader, one should first practice the behavior desired for others to follow and then look for opportunities to share experience and learning to help the protégé “navigate a course to the destination.” (John C. Maxwell)
By Michele Costello, Surviving Spouse Advisory Committee
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